Why am I doing this?
Have you ever felt a sense of dread? As if someone were lurking in the shadows behind you and about to pounce? Have you ever thought about what would happen if you were to turn around and confront your nemesis?
Well, one day I did just that. I turned around and found that there really was someone there! That person was me; just standing there and looking back at myself in a cold judgemental way. I have to tell you, as much as it took a lot of courage to turn around in the first place, it has taken even more to explore why it was that I felt this way about my life. This writing project is part of that exploration.
Writing the stories and poems and taking the photographs on this site are evidence of an elaborate experiment of mine: to determine the effect of journalling and play therapy on chronic depression. For me, the journalling happens when I actually do some writing… or thinking about writing… (you should read some of my thoughts. They’re like the fish that got away; and so you do not truly realise how profound I really am!) . Beyond this, it goes without saying that this website is my latest toy and hence, the “play therapy”!
So, exactly why am I doing this again?
I remember asking a psychiatrist, whom I know, if he had any patients who had come off their prescription medication permanently, and were living happy lives. He told me that he did not have any such persons among his clients! Needless to mention, having heard that, I had a new game at hand. I remember issuing a challenge to myself that I would try to see if I could find a way to harness the vast resources of my very ordinary human mind to heal myself.
So, having realised that the person who has frightened me most is myself, I set about confronting the bullies that are my conscience, my memory bank and my expectations of myself. I realisd that I’d have to strip down my identity and reconstruct it again in an image in which I was more pleased.
So, if you’re reading this now, you’re now a part of my process. As yet, though, I haven’t decided if I’m still in the strip down phase, or if I’m now transforming my life. I like to think that I’m doing a bit of both simultaneously; but we will see…
So, I present to you, a series of stories that I hope will cause you to reflect upon your own lives, and hopefully, be inspired to write, or act, or think, or do…It will be a mixed blend, combining some horror, mystery, erotica, play… I’ll go wherever my mood and my imagination lead me… and if you’ll indulge me, I’ll take my time getting there…
Please click here for a free tutorial on how to write short stories.